Picky Eaters

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    Managing mealtime sensory overload at holiday gatherings: Supporting children with allergies and feeding differences

    ByLondon Speech and Feeding
    Managing mealtime sensory overload at holiday gatherings: Supporting children with allergies and feeding differences

    Holiday meals are meant to be joyful and something we all look forward to. But for many children and their families, these occasions can be overwhelming and be the cause of dread and worry. The combination of new smells, unfamiliar foods, loud environments, social expectations, and allergy anxieties can quickly turn what should be a festive time into a stressful one.

    For parents of children with sensory processing differences, selective eating challenges, or food allergies, holiday gatherings often require careful planning and a big dose of tolerance and compassion. The good news is that with awareness and a few gentle strategies, you can support your child to feel safe, regulated, and included during festive meals without pressure, tears, or discomfort.

    Let’s explore how to make holiday mealtimes calmer, safer, and more connected this season.

    🎄 Why holiday meals feel so overwhelming

    Holiday gatherings usually combine several sensory triggers all at once:

    • Noisy, chaotic rooms
    • Strong smells from a mix of foods we don’t normally cook
    • Multiple conversations happening at once
    • Bright lights, Christmas décor, flickering candles
    • Unfamiliar foods with unexpected textures
    • Expectations to ‘try everything’ or ‘enjoy it’s sooo good!’
    • New environments, seating arrangements, or routines

    For children with sensory sensitivities, this can feel like a tidal wave of input. Research shows that children who are sensory-sensitive often have heightened responses to smell, taste, and texture, which may lead to avoidance or distress at mealtimes (Cermak, Curtin, & Bandini, 2010).

    Add food allergies into the picture and anxiety increases even further for both children and parents. A 2020 study by DunnGalvin et al. found that children with food allergies experience significantly higher stress in shared eating environments, especially when food preparation or contamination risk is hard to control.

    So, if your child becomes tearful, shuts down, or refuses to sit at the festive table, it isn’t ‘bad behaviour.’ It’s sensory overload, heightened vigilance, or discomfort communicating through their body.

    🌟 Preparing your child for a calmer festive meal

    Preparation is especially important for sensory-sensitive or allergy-aware children. Here’s how to set them up for success:

    1. Offer predictability through previewing

    Before the event, show your child pictures of:

    • where you’re going
    • who will be there
    • the types of foods that might be served
    • where they might sit

    A visual schedule or social story can help reduce anxiety and give your child a sense of control.

    2. Pack safe foods without apology

    If your child has allergies or selective eating, bring:

    • ‘Safe foods’ you know they will eat
    • Backup snacks
    • A separate (their own) plate, if needed
    • Emergency medication

    Announce clear, firm boundaries such as:

    ‘Ok people, these are Jamie’s safe foods — we’ll stick with these today.’ This will help relatives understand without pressure or judgement.

    3. Choose seating that supports sensory regulation

    If possible, seat your child:

    • at the end of the table
    • near a familiar adult
    • away from the kitchen (strong smells)
    • away from noise clusters
    • give them their favourite toy or fidget whilst waiting

    Let them take breaks when needed. This isn’t ‘rude,’ it’s self-regulation.

    🍽️ Supporting children during the meal

    1. Focus on connection, not consumption

    The holidays are not the time to expand your child’s food range. Keeping mealtimes low-pressure actually supports long-term progress.

    In fact, the research is clear: pressuring children to eat decreases acceptance and increases refusal (Galloway et al., 2006).

    So instead of ‘Just try it!’ try:

    • ‘You don’t have to eat it, you can look at it.’
    • ‘You’re in charge of what goes in your mouth.’
    • ‘You can keep your safe foods on your plate.’

    2. Protect your child’s allergy safety

    Holiday meals often include:

    • cross-contamination risks
    • shared utensils
    • buffets
    • homemade dishes without ingredient lists

    Use gentle but firm scripts:

    • ‘Because of Ellie’s allergies, we’ll keep her plate separate.’
    • ‘We’ll serve her food ourselves to make sure she stays safe.’

    Confidence in your boundary helps others respect it.

    3. Manage sensory load in real time

    Offer:

    • headphones
    • a small chew or fidget toy
    • a designated ‘calm corner’
    • time outside for fresh air
    • a predictable signal for breaks (e.g., a hand squeeze or card)

    Remember, sensory regulation is healthcare, not ‘giving in.’

    4. Model calm eating

    Children learn most from watching.

    Slow, happy bites and relaxed facial expressions tell the nervous system: ‘This environment is safe’.

    💛 What to say to well-meaning relatives

    Families often have big feelings about food. You can prepare nice phrases like:

    • ‘We’re focusing on helping him feel safe around food today.’
    • ‘She has allergies, so we’re sticking to our plan.’
    • ‘We’re avoiding pressure because it helps him eat better long term.’
    • ‘We’re celebrating together, eating is not the goal today.’

    Setting expectations ahead of time can reduce awkward moments later.

    🎁 The bigger picture: It’s about safety, not ‘picky eating’

    Children with allergies, sensory differences, or feeding challenges aren’t trying to be difficult. They are trying to stay safe, regulated, and comfortable.

    Your calm presence, gentle boundaries, and preparation create the conditions for a holiday that feels peaceful, not pressured.

    Sonja McGeachie

    Highly Specialist Speech and Language Therapist

    Owner of The London Speech and Feeding Practice.

    Health Professions Council registered
    Royal College of Speech & Language Therapists Member
    Member of ASLTIP

    Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

    📚Research References

    Cermak, S. A., Curtin, C., & Bandini, L. G. (2010). Food selectivity and sensory sensitivity in children with autism spectrum disorders. Journal of the American Dietetic Association, 110(2), 238–246.

    DunnGalvin, A. et al. (2020). APPEAL-2: A pan-European qualitative study to explore the burden of peanut-allergic children, teenagers and their caregivers. Clinical & Experimental Allergy, 50(11), 1238–1248.

    Galloway, A. T., Fiorito, L. M., Francis, L. A., & Birch, L. L. (2006). ‘Finish your soup!’ Counterproductive effects of pressuring children to eat on intake and affect. Appetite, 46(3), 318–323.

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    Baby-led weaning: Empowering little eaters from the start

    ByLondon Speech and Feeding

    I had a mum ask me about Baby Led Weaning the other day. So I thought I would write a blog on all the useful questions she had and what we discussed as it may help lots of mums and dads out there.

    Image by Freepik

    As a Paediatric Feeding SLT, one of the exciting developments in recent years is the growing interest in baby-led weaning (BLW). This approach to introducing solids has gained significant traction, and for good reason. It empowers infants to take the lead in their feeding journey, fostering a positive relationship with food and supporting important developmental milestones.

    What exactly is baby-led weaning?

    At its core, baby-led weaning is about offering your baby appropriately sized and textured solid foods from the very beginning, allowing him or her to self-feed. Instead of spoon-feeding purées, you present whole, soft foods that your baby can grasp, bring to his or her mouth, and explore at his or her own pace. This means no mashing, no blending, and no forcing spoons into reluctant mouths. It’s a fun, messy, and intuitive process that is led by your baby’s natural instincts.

    The genesis of baby-led weaning

    ‘Baby-led weaning’ was popularised by British health visitor Gill Rapley. In the early 2000s, Rapley observed that babies naturally develop the skills needed to self-feed and that traditional spoon-feeding might actually hinder this development. Her work, particularly her book Baby-Led Weaning: The Essential Guide to Introducing Solid Foods (co-authored with Tracey Murkett), published in 2008, brought BLW into the mainstream and provided a structured framework for parents. Her research and observations highlighted the benefits of trusting a baby’s innate ability to regulate his or her intake and explore different textures.

    What’s the deal?

    Implementing BLW is simpler than you might think, though it does require a shift in mindset. Here’s a breakdown of what it typically involves:

    • Readiness is key: The golden rule of BLW is to wait until your baby shows clear signs of readiness. This isn’t about age alone, but rather developmental milestones. Your baby should be at least six months old, able to sit unassisted, have good head and neck control, show an interest in food (e.g., reaching for yours), and have lost his or her tongue-thrust reflex (which pushes solids out of his or her mouth).
    • Offer finger foods: Start with soft, easily graspable foods cut into finger-sized sticks or spears. Think cooked sweet potato fries, steamed broccoli florets (soft enough to mash with gentle pressure), banana sticks, or avocado slices. The goal is for babies to be able to pick it up and get some into their mouth.
    • Embrace the mess: BLW is inherently messy, especially in the beginning. Food will be squished, dropped, and smeared. This is a crucial part of the learning process as babies explore textures, smells, and the properties of food. A wipeable mat under the highchair and a good bib are your best friends!
    • Observe, don’t interfere: Allow your baby to lead. He or she will decide what to eat, how much, and how quickly. Avoid putting food into his or her mouth or pressuring him or her to eat more. This respects his or her hunger and fullness cues, laying the foundation for healthy eating habits.
    • Continue breastmilk or formula: Until your baby is well-established on solids, breastmilk or formula remains his or her primary source of nutrition. Solids are for exploration, taste, and developing skills, gradually increasing in quantity over time.

    The benefits of baby-led weaning

    The advantages of BLW extend far beyond simply getting food into your baby. From a speech and feeding perspective, the benefits are compelling:

    • Develops oral motor skills: Chewing, gnawing, and manipulating various food textures are crucial for developing the muscles in the mouth, jaw, and tongue. This strengthens the oral motor skills necessary for speech development.
    • Enhances fine motor skills and hand-eye coordination: The act of grasping food, bringing it to the mouth, and coordinating these movements significantly refines fine motor skills and hand-eye coordination.
    • Promotes self-regulation and intuitive eating: By allowing babies to control their intake, BLW helps them tune into their own hunger and fullness cues, fostering a healthy relationship with food and reducing the likelihood of overeating.
    • Encourages adventurous eating: Exposure to a wide variety of tastes and textures from the outset can lead to less picky eating later. Babies are more likely to accept new foods when they have been in control of their exploration.
    • Facilitates family mealtimes: BLW integrates babies into family mealtimes from an early age, promoting social interaction and making mealtime a shared, enjoyable experience.

    When is baby-led weaning appropriate, and when not?

    While BLW offers numerous benefits, it’s not a one-size-fits-all approach.

    When BLW is appropriate:

    • When your baby meets all the developmental readiness signs: This is paramount for safety and success.
    • When you are comfortable with the mess and the learning curve: It requires patience and a relaxed attitude.
    • When you are committed to offering a variety of safe, appropriate foods.
    • When you are willing to learn about and practise safe food preparation to minimise choking hazards.

    When BLW might not be appropriate (or requires extra caution and professional guidance):

    • If your baby has a history of prematurity or significant developmental delays: His or her oral motor skills might not be sufficiently developed.
    • If your baby has certain medical conditions or anatomical differences (e.g., cleft palate, severe reflux, swallowing difficulties): These may necessitate a modified approach to feeding.
    • If there are significant feeding difficulties, aversion, or a history of choking incidents.
    • If you feel overly anxious about choking: While BLW, when done correctly, is not associated with a higher choking risk than traditional weaning, parental anxiety can impact the feeding experience. Education and consultation with a professional can help alleviate these concerns.

    A note on safety: Choking hazards

    It’s crucial to understand the difference between gagging and choking. Gagging is a natural reflex that helps prevent choking and is very common in BLW as babies learn to manage food in their mouths. Choking is silent and serious. To minimise choking risks:

    • Always supervise your baby closely during mealtimes.
    • Offer appropriately sized and textured foods. Avoid small, round, hard foods like whole grapes, nuts, popcorn, and large chunks of meat.
    • Ensure your baby is sitting upright and calm.
    • Educate yourself on infant CPR.

    Final thoughts

    Baby-led weaning is a wonderfully empowering approach that celebrates a baby’s natural abilities and fosters a positive and independent relationship with food. As Speech and Language Therapists we often see the positive impact it has on oral motor development, self-regulation, and overall feeding confidence. By understanding what it entails, when it’s appropriate, and prioritising safety, you can embark on this exciting journey with your little one, helping him or her become a confident and capable eater from the very first bite.

    If you would like help and support with weaning your baby whilst continuing to breastfeed then please get in touch!

    Sonja McGeachie

    Highly Specialist Speech and Language Therapist

    Owner of The London Speech and Feeding Practice.

    Health Professions Council registered
    Royal College of Speech & Language Therapists Member
    Member of ASLTIP

    Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

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    The picky eater’s plate: Introducing solids to toddlers with ARFID

    ByLondon Speech and Feeding
    Designed by Freepik

    Mealtimes can be a battleground for parents of picky eaters, especially toddlers with Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID). I see a great number of toddlers with Autism traits and many of my clients are picky eaters from mild to severe. Take a look at my blog for an outline of what the issues are and how to try and help.

    ARFID goes beyond typical ‘picky eating’ and can significantly impact a child’s growth, nutrition, and social-emotional well-being. If your toddler is resistant to trying new foods or has a very limited diet, here are some strategies to navigate the introduction of solids:

    1. Understand ARFID:

    ARFID is a diagnosable eating disorder characterised by:

    • Limited food variety: Eating only a small range of foods, often with specific textures or colours.
    • Fear of new foods: Intense anxiety or aversion to trying unfamiliar foods.
    • Sensory sensitivities: Heightened sensitivity to taste, smell, texture, or appearance of food.
    • Lack of interest in eating: May show little interest in food or mealtimes.

    2. Seek professional guidance:

    • Paediatrician and/or gastroenterologist: Rule out any underlying medical conditions.
    • Registered dietitian: Assess nutritional needs and create a balanced meal plan.
    • Speech and language therapist (SLT): If oral-motor skills or sensory sensitivities are contributing to feeding difficulties.
    • Occupational therapist (OT): If sensory processing challenges are affecting mealtime behaviours.
    • Child psychologist: If anxiety or emotional factors are contributing to ARFID.

    3. Strategies for introducing solids:

    • Start small: Introduce one new food at a time, in small amounts, alongside familiar favourites.
    • Patience is key: It can take multiple exposures (up to 10–15 times!) for a child to accept a new food. Don’t give up!
    • Positive reinforcement: Praise and encouragement for any interaction with the new food, even just touching or smelling it.
    • No pressure: Avoid forcing or pressuring the child to eat. This can create negative associations with food.
    • Make it fun: Present food in playful ways, use cookie cutters for fun shapes, or involve the child in food preparation.
    • Sensory exploration: Encourage exploration of food through touch, smell, and sight before tasting.
    • Role modelling: Show the child that you enjoy eating a variety of foods.
    • Use fun utensils: your child might like characters from ‘Frozen’ or ‘Dinosaurs’ or ‘Diggers’ there are a host of character-based cutlery and cups/plates to be had. Also, I really rate these two items very highly they are so good so I want to share these with you. Both are available online. But warning: the cup is outrageously expensive as it comes from the United States and is sold by a small scale company. But I feel this is cup very worth trying, I have had good results with this.
    NumNum Baby Spoons Set
    TalkTools Recessed Lid Cup with Handles
    • Gradual desensitisation: Start with foods that are similar in texture or taste to accepted foods, then gradually introduce more challenging options.
    • Food chaining: Introduce new foods that are similar in taste, texture, or appearance to accepted foods.

    4. Mealtime Environment:

    • Positive and relaxed: Create a calm and enjoyable mealtime atmosphere.
    • No distractions: Minimise distractions like TV or toys.
    • Consistent schedule: Offer meals and snacks at regular times.
    • Child-sized portions: Offer small, manageable portions to avoid overwhelming the child.
    • Involve the child: Let the child choose their utensils, plate, or cup.

    5. Remember:

    • Every child is different: What works for one child may not work for another.
    • Progress takes time: Be patient and celebrate small victories.
    • Focus on the positive: Praise any positive interaction with food.
    • Seek support: Connect with other parents or support groups.

    Introducing solids to toddlers with ARFID can be challenging, but with patience, persistence, and professional guidance, you can help your child develop a healthier relationship with food.

    Get in touch with me via my contact form if you need support

    Sonja McGeachie

    Early Intervention Speech and Language Therapist

    Feeding and Dysphagia (Swallowing) Specialist The London Speech and Feeding Practice

    The London Speech and Feeding Practice

    Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

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    Feeding therapy: A guide for parents and caregivers

    ByLondon Speech and Feeding
    Image by gpointstudio on Freepik

    Feeding therapy is a specialised form of therapy and support that helps children develop healthy eating habits and overcome challenges related to food. It’s often used for children with picky eating, feeding disorders, or sensory processing issues.

    What is feeding therapy?

    Feeding therapy involves a series of techniques designed to improve a child’s eating skills and attitudes towards food. In the UK it’s typically provided by speech and language therapists and dietitians. These professionals work closely with parents and caregivers to create a personalised treatment plan tailored to each child’s unique needs.

    How does feeding therapy work?

    Feeding therapy sessions are typically 30–60 minutes long and involve a variety of techniques, including:

    • Family counselling: Providing support and guidance to parents and caregivers. This can help address any practical, behavioural and emotional issues that may be impacting the child’s eating.
    • Play-based activities: Engaging children in fun activities while introducing new foods or textures. This can help alleviate anxiety and make mealtimes more enjoyable.
    • Sensory exploration: Helping children become more comfortable with different tastes, smells, and textures. This can be achieved through activities like touching, smelling, and tasting various foods.
    • Oral motor exercises: Improving chewing, swallowing, and lip coordination. These exercises can help children develop the necessary skills for eating independently.
    • Behavioural techniques: Using positive reinforcement to encourage healthy eating habits. This can involve rewarding children for trying new foods or eating a variety of meals.

    When is feeding therapy needed?

    Feeding therapy may be beneficial for children who:

    • Are picky eaters: Refuse to eat a variety of foods or have strong preferences.
    • Have feeding disorders: Experience difficulties with eating, such as swallowing or chewing.
    • Have sensory processing issues: Are sensitive to certain textures, smells, or tastes.
    • Have medical conditions: Such as autism, cerebral palsy, or gastrointestinal disorders.

    Feeding therapy strategies you can try at home

    While professional feeding therapy can be invaluable, there are several techniques you can try at home to support your child’s eating development:

    • Create a positive mealtime environment: Make mealtimes enjoyable and stress-free by avoiding distractions, limiting screen time, and creating a calm atmosphere.
    • Create regular mealtimes and mealtime routines: Introduce set ways of announcing meal times, including songs or short nursery rhymes, try and involve your child with table setting, even just carrying their spoon to the table and putting the beaker next to the plate and ensure that meal time finishes after about 30 minutes, again with a set routine so that the child always knows: this is how we do it in our home, now I am finished and meal time is over.
    • Introduce new foods gradually: Start with small amounts and gradually increase exposure. This can help reduce anxiety and make new foods less overwhelming.
    • Model healthy eating: Show your child how to enjoy a variety of foods by eating a balanced diet yourself.
    • Avoid forcing food: Allow your child to choose and explore foods at their own pace. Forcing them to eat can create negative associations with food.

    Seek professional help

    If you’re concerned about your child’s eating habits, consult with a feeding therapist. We can provide guidance and support.

    Remember, feeding therapy is a collaborative process between parents, caregivers, and professionals. With patience, understanding, and the right strategies, you can help your child develop healthy eating habits and enjoy meals.

    Would you like to know more about specific techniques or have any other questions about feeding therapy?

    Please feel free to contact me.

    Sonja McGeachie

    Early Intervention Speech and Language Therapist

    Feeding and Dysphagia (Swallowing) Specialist The London Speech and Feeding Practice

    The London Speech and Feeding Practice

    Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

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