Sensory Processing Disorder Parent Support

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    Managing mealtime sensory overload at holiday gatherings: Supporting children with allergies and feeding differences

    ByLondon Speech and Feeding
    Managing mealtime sensory overload at holiday gatherings: Supporting children with allergies and feeding differences

    Holiday meals are meant to be joyful and something we all look forward to. But for many children and their families, these occasions can be overwhelming and be the cause of dread and worry. The combination of new smells, unfamiliar foods, loud environments, social expectations, and allergy anxieties can quickly turn what should be a festive time into a stressful one.

    For parents of children with sensory processing differences, selective eating challenges, or food allergies, holiday gatherings often require careful planning and a big dose of tolerance and compassion. The good news is that with awareness and a few gentle strategies, you can support your child to feel safe, regulated, and included during festive meals without pressure, tears, or discomfort.

    Let’s explore how to make holiday mealtimes calmer, safer, and more connected this season.

    🎄 Why holiday meals feel so overwhelming

    Holiday gatherings usually combine several sensory triggers all at once:

    • Noisy, chaotic rooms
    • Strong smells from a mix of foods we don’t normally cook
    • Multiple conversations happening at once
    • Bright lights, Christmas décor, flickering candles
    • Unfamiliar foods with unexpected textures
    • Expectations to ‘try everything’ or ‘enjoy it’s sooo good!’
    • New environments, seating arrangements, or routines

    For children with sensory sensitivities, this can feel like a tidal wave of input. Research shows that children who are sensory-sensitive often have heightened responses to smell, taste, and texture, which may lead to avoidance or distress at mealtimes (Cermak, Curtin, & Bandini, 2010).

    Add food allergies into the picture and anxiety increases even further for both children and parents. A 2020 study by DunnGalvin et al. found that children with food allergies experience significantly higher stress in shared eating environments, especially when food preparation or contamination risk is hard to control.

    So, if your child becomes tearful, shuts down, or refuses to sit at the festive table, it isn’t ‘bad behaviour.’ It’s sensory overload, heightened vigilance, or discomfort communicating through their body.

    🌟 Preparing your child for a calmer festive meal

    Preparation is especially important for sensory-sensitive or allergy-aware children. Here’s how to set them up for success:

    1. Offer predictability through previewing

    Before the event, show your child pictures of:

    • where you’re going
    • who will be there
    • the types of foods that might be served
    • where they might sit

    A visual schedule or social story can help reduce anxiety and give your child a sense of control.

    2. Pack safe foods without apology

    If your child has allergies or selective eating, bring:

    • ‘Safe foods’ you know they will eat
    • Backup snacks
    • A separate (their own) plate, if needed
    • Emergency medication

    Announce clear, firm boundaries such as:

    ‘Ok people, these are Jamie’s safe foods — we’ll stick with these today.’ This will help relatives understand without pressure or judgement.

    3. Choose seating that supports sensory regulation

    If possible, seat your child:

    • at the end of the table
    • near a familiar adult
    • away from the kitchen (strong smells)
    • away from noise clusters
    • give them their favourite toy or fidget whilst waiting

    Let them take breaks when needed. This isn’t ‘rude,’ it’s self-regulation.

    🍽️ Supporting children during the meal

    1. Focus on connection, not consumption

    The holidays are not the time to expand your child’s food range. Keeping mealtimes low-pressure actually supports long-term progress.

    In fact, the research is clear: pressuring children to eat decreases acceptance and increases refusal (Galloway et al., 2006).

    So instead of ‘Just try it!’ try:

    • ‘You don’t have to eat it, you can look at it.’
    • ‘You’re in charge of what goes in your mouth.’
    • ‘You can keep your safe foods on your plate.’

    2. Protect your child’s allergy safety

    Holiday meals often include:

    • cross-contamination risks
    • shared utensils
    • buffets
    • homemade dishes without ingredient lists

    Use gentle but firm scripts:

    • ‘Because of Ellie’s allergies, we’ll keep her plate separate.’
    • ‘We’ll serve her food ourselves to make sure she stays safe.’

    Confidence in your boundary helps others respect it.

    3. Manage sensory load in real time

    Offer:

    • headphones
    • a small chew or fidget toy
    • a designated ‘calm corner’
    • time outside for fresh air
    • a predictable signal for breaks (e.g., a hand squeeze or card)

    Remember, sensory regulation is healthcare, not ‘giving in.’

    4. Model calm eating

    Children learn most from watching.

    Slow, happy bites and relaxed facial expressions tell the nervous system: ‘This environment is safe’.

    💛 What to say to well-meaning relatives

    Families often have big feelings about food. You can prepare nice phrases like:

    • ‘We’re focusing on helping him feel safe around food today.’
    • ‘She has allergies, so we’re sticking to our plan.’
    • ‘We’re avoiding pressure because it helps him eat better long term.’
    • ‘We’re celebrating together, eating is not the goal today.’

    Setting expectations ahead of time can reduce awkward moments later.

    🎁 The bigger picture: It’s about safety, not ‘picky eating’

    Children with allergies, sensory differences, or feeding challenges aren’t trying to be difficult. They are trying to stay safe, regulated, and comfortable.

    Your calm presence, gentle boundaries, and preparation create the conditions for a holiday that feels peaceful, not pressured.

    Sonja McGeachie

    Highly Specialist Speech and Language Therapist

    Owner of The London Speech and Feeding Practice.

    Health Professions Council registered
    Royal College of Speech & Language Therapists Member
    Member of ASLTIP

    Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

    📚Research References

    Cermak, S. A., Curtin, C., & Bandini, L. G. (2010). Food selectivity and sensory sensitivity in children with autism spectrum disorders. Journal of the American Dietetic Association, 110(2), 238–246.

    DunnGalvin, A. et al. (2020). APPEAL-2: A pan-European qualitative study to explore the burden of peanut-allergic children, teenagers and their caregivers. Clinical & Experimental Allergy, 50(11), 1238–1248.

    Galloway, A. T., Fiorito, L. M., Francis, L. A., & Birch, L. L. (2006). ‘Finish your soup!’ Counterproductive effects of pressuring children to eat on intake and affect. Appetite, 46(3), 318–323.

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    Why auditory memory matters (especially for little ones!)

    ByLondon Speech and Feeding
    Why auditory memory matters (especially for little ones!)

    Have you ever stopped to think about how we learn to speak, understand, and communicate effectively? It’s a complex dance of various cognitive skills, and one often overlooked but absolutely crucial player in this orchestra is auditory memory. It’s not just about remembering sounds. It’s about remembering sequences of sounds, which is fundamental to language development.

    What exactly is auditory memory?

    At its core, auditory memory is our ability to take in, process, store, and recall information that we hear. Think of it as your brain’s internal recording studio. When someone speaks to you, your auditory memory is busy at work, capturing the individual sounds, the order in which they appear, and the rhythm and intonation of the words. This isn’t just for long-term recall; it’s also vital for working auditory memory, which allows us to hold onto a small amount of auditory information for a short period, just long enough to make sense of it.

    For speech and language, auditory memory is essential for:

    • Understanding spoken language: To comprehend a sentence, we need to remember the beginning of the sentence by the time we hear the end.
    • Following instructions: Remembering a sequence of commands relies heavily on auditory memory.
    • Learning new words: We hear a word, remember its sound, and connect it to its meaning.
    • Developing phonological awareness: This is the ability to recognise and manipulate the sounds in spoken language, a critical precursor to reading. Auditory memory helps children distinguish between similar-sounding words (e.g., ‘cat’ vs. ‘bat’) and segment words into individual sounds.
    • Producing clear speech: To articulate words correctly, we need to recall the precise sequence of sounds that make up that word.
    • Developing conversational skills: Remembering what was just said helps us formulate appropriate responses.

    When auditory memory falls short: The impact on speech

    When auditory memory is poor, particularly in young children, the ripple effects on speech and language development can be significant. Children might struggle with:

    • Following multi-step directions: ‘Put on your shoes, get your coat, and meet me at the door’ can become an overwhelming jumble of sounds.
    • Learning new vocabulary: They might hear a new word repeatedly but struggle to retain its sound pattern, making it difficult to recognise or use later.
    • Understanding stories or conversations: Missing key details or losing the thread of a narrative because they can’t hold enough information in their working memory.
    • Developing phonological skills: Difficulty with rhyming, identifying initial sounds in words, or blending sounds together to form words, which can impact early literacy.
    • Speech production: They might mispronounce words, omit sounds, or struggle with the correct sequencing of sounds within words.
    • Social communication: Difficulty participating in group discussions, remembering names, or recalling what their peers have said.
    • Academic performance: Auditory memory challenges can impact a child’s ability to learn in a classroom setting, where much of the instruction is delivered verbally.

    It’s important to note that poor auditory memory isn’t a sign of low intelligence, but rather a specific processing challenge that can be addressed with targeted support.

    Nurturing auditory memory in under 5s: Preparing for schooling

    The good news is that auditory memory is a skill that can be strengthened and developed, especially during the crucial early years. For children under five, laying a strong foundation in auditory memory is an invaluable gift as they prepare for the demands of formal schooling. Here’s what we can do to help:

    1. Read aloud regularly: This is perhaps one of the most powerful tools. As you read, encourage your child to listen for specific words, predict what happens next, and retell parts of the story. Vary your voice, use different intonations, and pause to emphasise key words.
    2. Play auditory memory games:
      • ‘Simon says’: This classic game is fantastic for following multi-step instructions. Start with one command and gradually increase the number.
      • ‘I Spy’ with sounds: Instead of colours, describe sounds. ‘I spy with my little ear something that goes “moo”.’
      • Rhyming games: Sing rhyming songs, read rhyming books, and encourage your child to come up with words that rhyme.
      • Sound matching: Use everyday objects to make sounds (e.g., shaking keys, tapping a spoon) and have your child identify or match them.
      • ‘Memory chain’: Start a sentence and have your child add to it, remembering everything that came before: ‘I went to the market and bought an apple.’ ‘I went to the market and bought an apple and a banana.’
    3. Sing songs and nursery rhymes: Repetitive songs and nursery rhymes are excellent for developing auditory memory, rhythm, and phonological awareness. The predictable patterns help children anticipate and remember sequences of sounds and words.
    4. Give multi-step instructions (and praise!): Start with two-step instructions and gradually increase the complexity as your child’s skills improve. Always give positive reinforcement when they succeed. ‘Please pick up the red block and put it in the box.’
    5. Engage in active listening: Model good listening skills yourself. When your child is speaking, give them your full attention. Ask clarifying questions to encourage them to elaborate and organise their thoughts.
    6. Reduce background noise: A quiet environment makes it easier for young children to focus on auditory information. Minimise distractions like TV or loud music during activities that require listening.
    7. Use visual cues: While we’re focusing on auditory memory, sometimes pairing auditory information with visual cues can be helpful, especially initially. For example, when giving instructions, demonstrate the action as you say it.
    8. Be patient and consistent: Developing auditory memory takes time and consistent practice. Celebrate small victories and create a playful, supportive environment for learning.

    By actively engaging in these strategies, we can empower our youngest learners to build robust auditory memory skills, setting them up for success not only in speech and language development but also in their overall academic journey. It’s an investment that truly pays dividends in their future communication and learning abilities.

    Any comments or if you need help and support with your child’s speech please do not hesitate to get in touch with me: simply fill out the contact form here on the website. I endeavour to reply within 48 hours.

    Sonja McGeachie

    Highly Specialist Speech and Language Therapist

    Owner of The London Speech and Feeding Practice.

    Health Professions Council registered
    Royal College of Speech & Language Therapists Member
    Member of ASLTIP

    Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

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    The power of containment: A therapeutic approach for autistic children

    ByLondon Speech and Feeding
    Photo by lemonlenz

    The practice of wrapping or swaddling children, often referred to as ‘containment,’ has been used for centuries to soothe and comfort infants. I use this therapeutic approach with autistic children at the London Speech and Feeding Practice. While it might seem counterintuitive, the act of being tightly wrapped can provide significant benefits for children who struggle with sensory processing, emotional regulation, and communication.

    Understanding sensory processing and autism

    Autistic persons often experience challenges with sensory processing, which is their brain’s ability to interpret and respond to sensory information. This can lead to sensory overload or under-responsivity. Containment can be a valuable tool in helping children regulate their sensory input.

    Photo by lemonlenz

    To summarise, here are some of the benefits of containment:

    • Sensory Regulation:
      • Provides deep pressure input: The tight, enveloping sensation of being wrapped can provide deep pressure input, which is calming and organising for many children.
      • Reduces sensory overload: By creating a controlled sensory environment, containment can help to reduce overstimulation and promote a sense of safety.
    • Emotional Regulation:
      • Containment creates a sense of security: Being wrapped tightly can mimic the feeling of being in the womb, providing a sense of security and comfort.
      • Facilitates calming: The deep pressure input can help to calm the nervous system and reduce anxiety.
    • Improved Body Awareness:
      • Enhances proprioception: Containment can improve the child’s awareness of their body in space, which is essential for motor development and sensory integration. I often provide extra pressure on a child’s arms and legs sticking out of the yoga mat; this helps my child understand where their limbs are in space: I can feel my legs and I can feel my arms and I can feel where they are right now, i.e. they are under Sonja’s hand, I can feel them.
    • Facilitates Communication – and this is obviously where I come in as a Speech and Language Therapist:
      • Swaddling creates a safe space: When a child feels calm and secure, they are more likely to engage in communication.
      • Enhances joint attention: The shared experience of being wrapped can foster joint attention, which is essential for language development. You can see this one in my highlights where I swaddle my student in the yoga mat (picture above). She absolutely loves it, and what is more she is calm and steady when usually this child likes to be on the move constantly. Here we have a wonderful moment of joint engagement. She looks at me, she can listen to what I say or sing, and she can tell me in her own way to carry on rolling her or to carry on singing or providing calming pressure to her legs and arms or to stop.

    A few pointers for when you try this at home: How to practise containment safely and effectively

    • Create a safe environment: Ensure the wrapping material is soft, breathable, and free from any hazards.
    • Observe your child’s cues: Pay attention to your child’s body language and verbal cues to determine their comfort level.
    • Respect your child’s boundaries: If your child shows signs of distress, stop the containment immediately – this might seem obvious but sometimes we adults get so carried away with some ‘great idea’ that we have seen work elsewhere. And so we can be a little too ‘determined’ sometimes to ‘make it happen’… perhaps this rings a bell with some of my readers.
    • MAKE IT FUN: Start carefully and take it step by step. See if the student is having a nice time. It is all about trust and therefore it might not work the very first time you do it.

    It’s important to remember that containment is not a one-size-fits-all approach. Some children may respond better to other sensory-based interventions. However, for many autistic children containment can be a valuable tool in their journey towards improved communication and emotional regulation.

    For more information follow me on Instagram, Facebook or LinkedIn.

    Sonja McGeachie

    Early Intervention Speech and Language Therapist

    Feeding and Dysphagia (Swallowing) Specialist The London Speech and Feeding Practice

    The London Speech and Feeding Practice

    Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

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