Baby-Led Weaning: A Speech and Language Therapist’s Take

ByLondon Speech and Feeding
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adorable baby playing with food
Image by freepik

Let’s face it, introducing solids is a rollercoaster for parents. You’re bombarded with advice (solicited and otherwise) on purees, spoon-feeding, and the much-discussed ‘baby-led weaning’ (BLW). As a speech-language/feeding therapist I see the world through the lens of communication and development, as well as safe munching and swallowing. BLW can be a fantastic option for many little foodies. But is it right for yours? Let’s take a dive into the messy, hilarious world of toddler feeding.

BLW in a nutshell

Your baby, perched in their highchair, eyes wide with excitement and curiosity reaches out for a platter of food. He/She grabs a fat avocado slice, and curiously explore it with his/her lips, gums and tongue. He/She spits some of it out, mashes bits of it into his/her hair, there was a tiny swallow and the rest is smeared onto the high chair tray. Now he/she grabs a bit of the banana and rinse and repeat as before, except this one he/she keeps in his/her mouth for bit longer and takes a tiny bit more before the rest gets deposited into his/her bib.

This, in a nutshell, is BLW! It’s all about letting your little one take the lead in exploring new foods, textures, and tastes. No spoon-feeding, just pure, messy, self-directed feeding fun.

The pros of letting your little one loose on solids:

  • Motor Skills: BLW is a sensory party for developing motor skills. Picking up that slippery banana or gumming a chewy piece of toast strengthens those tiny hands and mouth muscles. These are the very skills they’ll need for future talking and chewing.
  • Texture Time: BLW exposes your baby to a variety of textures right from the start. Think soft, steamed broccoli florets or smooth, banana half-slices. This sensory exploration helps them develop an understanding of different textures in the world, which can translate to better oral motor skills needed for speech development.
  • Independence: BLW fosters a sense of self-feeding independence. Your toddler learns to control how much he/she eats and the pace of his/her meal. This can lead to better self-regulation later on, not just with food, but in other areas of his/her development too.
  • A wider variety of flavours: BLW encourages exposure to a wider variety of tastes and smells. Let your baby discover the sweetness of roasted sweet potato or the tang of mashed avocado! This early exploration can lead to less picky eating down the road.

There are some valid concerns:

  • Gagging vs. Choking: One of the biggest concerns parents have about BLW is choking. However, gagging is a natural reflex that helps babies learn to move food safely around their mouths. Choking is much rarer, and with proper food selection and supervision, the risk is very low. The con here really is parental anxiety more than anything else and if you can overcome this then a bit of gagging is just fine and part of the process. Choking, again most children do choke occasionally a bit! Of course, close supervision and common sense is very important here.
  • It’s ever so messy!: Be prepared for mashed banana on the highchair tray, rogue peas flung across the room, and a general sense of chaos. But then again, this is an important part of the learning process! I would encourage you to embrace the mess (within reason and your personal tolerance level) and focus on the fun of exploration.
  • Nutritional Concerns: Some parents worry that babies won’t get enough nutrients with BLW. While it might take a while for them to master the art of self-feeding, a healthy child’s body is pretty good at self-regulating. Offer a variety of healthy options, and he/she will eventually get the hang of it.

BLW: Is it right for your Little One?

BLW isn’t a one-size-fits-all approach. Here are some things to consider:

  • Developmental Milestones: Babies should be able to sit up with good head control and show an interest in food before starting BLW.
  • General good health and absence of food intolerances, allergies, or other significant health issues which might dictatea more controlled feeding regime.
  • Gag Reflex: A strong gag reflex is a good sign. It shows your baby’s natural ability to move food safely around their mouth. If, however, your baby’s gag is overly sensitive and causes frequent bouts of vomiting please consult your health care professional for an assessment (GP, Paediatrician, Dietician, Speech and Language – Feeding Therapist).
  • Your Comfort Level: BLW requires a relaxed and patient approach. If you’re feeling stressed about the mess or potential choking hazards, it might not be the right fit for you.

A final mouthful:

BLW can be a fantastic way to introduce your baby to solids. It promotes exploration, independence, and a love for food. Remember, there’s no pressure to go all-in on BLW. You can always combine it with spoon-feeding or purees to find an approach that works for your family and your child. The most important thing is to create a positive and relaxed mealtime environment where your little one can explore the wonderful world of food at their own pace.

P.S. As an SLT, I always recommend chatting with your health care professional. This way you can address any concerns you might have and ensure your baby is developmentally and physically on track for this exciting new chapter.

Don’t hesitate to contact me!

Sonja McGeachie

Early Intervention Speech and Language Therapist

Feeding and Dysphagia (Swallowing) Specialist The London Speech and Feeding Practice

The London Speech and Feeding Practice

Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

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    The picky eater’s plate: Introducing solids to toddlers with ARFID

    ByLondon Speech and Feeding
    Designed by Freepik

    Mealtimes can be a battleground for parents of picky eaters, especially toddlers with Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFID). I see a great number of toddlers with Autism traits and many of my clients are picky eaters from mild to severe. Take a look at my blog for an outline of what the issues are and how to try and help.

    ARFID goes beyond typical ‘picky eating’ and can significantly impact a child’s growth, nutrition, and social-emotional well-being. If your toddler is resistant to trying new foods or has a very limited diet, here are some strategies to navigate the introduction of solids:

    1. Understand ARFID:

    ARFID is a diagnosable eating disorder characterised by:

    • Limited food variety: Eating only a small range of foods, often with specific textures or colours.
    • Fear of new foods: Intense anxiety or aversion to trying unfamiliar foods.
    • Sensory sensitivities: Heightened sensitivity to taste, smell, texture, or appearance of food.
    • Lack of interest in eating: May show little interest in food or mealtimes.

    2. Seek professional guidance:

    • Paediatrician and/or gastroenterologist: Rule out any underlying medical conditions.
    • Registered dietitian: Assess nutritional needs and create a balanced meal plan.
    • Speech and language therapist (SLT): If oral-motor skills or sensory sensitivities are contributing to feeding difficulties.
    • Occupational therapist (OT): If sensory processing challenges are affecting mealtime behaviours.
    • Child psychologist: If anxiety or emotional factors are contributing to ARFID.

    3. Strategies for introducing solids:

    • Start small: Introduce one new food at a time, in small amounts, alongside familiar favourites.
    • Patience is key: It can take multiple exposures (up to 10–15 times!) for a child to accept a new food. Don’t give up!
    • Positive reinforcement: Praise and encouragement for any interaction with the new food, even just touching or smelling it.
    • No pressure: Avoid forcing or pressuring the child to eat. This can create negative associations with food.
    • Make it fun: Present food in playful ways, use cookie cutters for fun shapes, or involve the child in food preparation.
    • Sensory exploration: Encourage exploration of food through touch, smell, and sight before tasting.
    • Role modelling: Show the child that you enjoy eating a variety of foods.
    • Use fun utensils: your child might like characters from ‘Frozen’ or ‘Dinosaurs’ or ‘Diggers’ there are a host of character-based cutlery and cups/plates to be had. Also, I really rate these two items very highly they are so good so I want to share these with you. Both are available online. But warning: the cup is outrageously expensive as it comes from the United States and is sold by a small scale company. But I feel this is cup very worth trying, I have had good results with this.
    NumNum Baby Spoons Set
    TalkTools Recessed Lid Cup with Handles
    • Gradual desensitisation: Start with foods that are similar in texture or taste to accepted foods, then gradually introduce more challenging options.
    • Food chaining: Introduce new foods that are similar in taste, texture, or appearance to accepted foods.

    4. Mealtime Environment:

    • Positive and relaxed: Create a calm and enjoyable mealtime atmosphere.
    • No distractions: Minimise distractions like TV or toys.
    • Consistent schedule: Offer meals and snacks at regular times.
    • Child-sized portions: Offer small, manageable portions to avoid overwhelming the child.
    • Involve the child: Let the child choose their utensils, plate, or cup.

    5. Remember:

    • Every child is different: What works for one child may not work for another.
    • Progress takes time: Be patient and celebrate small victories.
    • Focus on the positive: Praise any positive interaction with food.
    • Seek support: Connect with other parents or support groups.

    Introducing solids to toddlers with ARFID can be challenging, but with patience, persistence, and professional guidance, you can help your child develop a healthier relationship with food.

    Get in touch with me via my contact form if you need support

    Sonja McGeachie

    Early Intervention Speech and Language Therapist

    Feeding and Dysphagia (Swallowing) Specialist The London Speech and Feeding Practice

    The London Speech and Feeding Practice

    Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

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  • · ·

    Are the Gestalts I model easy to mix and match later on?

    ByLondon Speech and Feeding
    Image by bearfotos on Freepik

    Here are some examples of great phrases and Gestalts that we could use:

    • Let’s get a banana / Let’s go out / Let’s play lego / Let’s go see daddy
    • That’s nice! / That’s really good! / That’s a green one / That’s a submarine
    • Need more help / Need a wee wee / Need that / Need to run
    • How about a biscuit / How about a cuddle / How about watching tv
    • We love bananas / We love a monkey / We love a cuddle

    Why or how could these examples be mixed and matched?

    You can see I have given several examples for each, that is how later a child can take one chunk (let’s) and add another (go out) or (need) + (go out).

    What about our own grammar? Should we be using grammatical phrases?

    In general for NLA 1 (Natural Language Acquisition stage 1) we want to use short phrases and keep them quite generic, something like:

    ‘Let’s go’ or ‘let’s play’ and pick 2-3 phrases per communicative function (see next point below).

    And if we are going to say longer sentences, for example: ‘let’s go and feed the ducks now’, then we should do so with good grammar and really varied intonation. It sometimes helps me to make up a little song/jingle on the spot that has a lot of intonation, more than I would perhaps use just by speaking.

    How many varied communicative functions do we cover with our modelling?

    We want to model a variety of Gestalts other than just requesting for example. In general, we are looking at our child having one or two Gestalts in the following areas before they are ready to move on into stage 2.

    These are the most common ones I see in my practice:

    • Requesting ‘want a banana/biscuit’ ‘Wanna play ball’
    • Transitioning: ‘what now?’ ‘what next?’
    • Ask for help: ‘need help’ ‘help me’ ‘mummy help’
    • Commenting: ‘it’s big’ ‘it’s red’ ‘it’s fast’ ‘too loud’
    • Speak up for self: ‘not that one’ ‘go now’ ‘stop it’

    Is the Gestalt I am modelling meaningful to my child?

    We don’t use all available Gestalts for every child. It has to be meaningful to the individual and has to match their interests. If our child is a big fan of feeding the ducks in the park then we can think about Gestalts like:

    • I see ducks!
    • They’re over there
    • Let’s feed them?
    • Let’s get some seeds
    • They’re coming!
    • They want food / They wanna eat!
    • That’s a big one
    • It’s so hungry
    • It loves the seeds!
    • No more! All done! Finished! Let’s go home

    What is my child actually trying to tell me?

    We have to be become word/phrase detectives! Is the phrase/script/Gestalt they are using right now actually meaning what they said or does it mean something else, and if so, what?

    Here is an example from my own personal experience in my practice:

    The little boy I was working/playing with was building a tall tower with blocks. When it finally fell with a great big bang he said in a sing-song voice ‘ring-a-ring-a roses’ … then he began to collect the blocks again to make a fresh tower. I sat there and thought: why ‘ring-a-ring-a roses’? What does that mean in this context? I then sang the song (silently) to myself with my detective hat on and realised as I came to the end that it finishes with ‘we all fall down’! it was a real AHA!!! moment for me as I saw right there what the meaning of his Gestalt was. He sang the first line of the song to say ‘all fall down!’

    So realising this I waited for the next tower to fall, and there it was again, he sang the first line of the song. I replied thus, copying him at first:

    ‘RING-A-RING-A ROSES – WE ALL FALL DOWN!…

    FALL DOWN

    WE LOVE IT FALLING DOWN.’

    The process to find what we should say is not always straight forward or easy at all, and often we don’t quite know in the moment what our child is trying to say. But we can try and get to know their interests and then gradually we do know more and more what the meaning behind the Gestalt is or could be.

    What pronouns should we use?

    This can be a tricky one.

    We don’t want to use language that uses the pronouns ‘you’ or ‘you’re’. The reason is that our child will likely copy us exactly as we have said it. Therefore, using pronouns ‘you’ and ‘you’re’ will then sound wrong.

    Always try to model language that is from the child’s perspective or in other words how they would say it if they could.

    Alternatively, you can model using WE or US. For example, if the child is tired, rather than saying ‘you are so tired’ model language from his or her point of view: ‘I’m tired’ or ‘let’s go have a lie down’.

    There is so much more to talk about. Stay tuned for a blog on NLA stage 2 coming soon.

    If you need help with your child, please do not hesitate to contact me.

    Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

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  • ·

    Supporting children and families living with verbal dyspraxia

    ByLondon Speech and Feeding

    “It’s brill-i-ant, it’s brill-ant, it’s brillnt”

    Have you ever wondered why children may pronounce a word correctly one minute and in the next breath they struggle to say the same word? It’s equally as frustrating for you as it is for your child. The biggest question of all is WHY? Why does this happen and what causes it? Whilst there are many explanations. When it persists, it might be a condition called verbal dyspraxia.

    What is verbal dyspraxia

    Verbal dyspraxia is a neurological motor speech disorder that affects the coordination and planning of muscle movements that are needed for speech production. A child may have difficulty making the precise movements needed for speech, which may result in inconsistent and unintelligible speech. Children may also have trouble sequencing sounds and syllables, producing speech sounds accurately, and coordinating the movements of their articulators (e.g., lips, tongue, teeth, jaw). This can lead to a range of speech errors (including sound distortions, substitutions, omissions, and difficulty with rhythm and prosody).

    We know that these speech errors, and not being able to get a message across, can be frustrating for children with speech difficulties. Can you imagine talking and limited people understanding you? It’s so tough on children and the people trying to communicate with them.

    Creating a person-centred therapy plan is vital. This allows your child to stay motivated, as intervention is likely to be long term. This planning may include favourite words to use during their hobby or favourite activity, or person-centred goals such as ‘giving Alexa an instruction’.

    Children with verbal dyspraxia can have several different ways of producing words, which often makes it trickier for them as there’s no consistent pattern to work with. So, we’ve put together some top tips to support their communication and make their (and your) lives a little easier in the process.

    Ten ways to make communication easier for your child with verbal dyspraxia

    • Have a list of frequently used words and practise this set. Little and often is best!
    • Use cued articulation to support speech production (ask your Speech and Language Therapist for the gestures)
    • Give time and use active listening. This means showing interest and trying not to think about what is on your never ending ‘to do’ list
    • Reduce frustration in any way that you can. This might mean allowing your child to demonstrate using gestures rather than speech. You might also give top tips for other adults or children who communicate with your child when out and about
    • Talk about the structure of words with your child (i.e., there are two beats/syllables in this word)
    • Show the written form of the word to go alongside their production
    • Split down tasks, so that your child only has to respond to one question at a time, reducing their motor capacity
    • Recognise when your child is working well and when they may need support of an Alternative and Augmentative Communication device
    • Allow all environments to have the same training and equipment (i.e., at school, home, out and about)
    • Have regular periods in the day where your child can practise their specific words in different environments. This can be effective for children with verbal dyspraxia

    Do you still have questions? Contact Sonja for support.

    Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

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  • · ·

    Speech sounds practice at home

    ByLondon Speech and Feeding

    Speech therapists use a variety of tools to help children master specific sounds, and then the students are sent home with some practice sheets to use daily. Parents are able to observe what we do in the session, but I know that back at home three days later they can’t quite remember what it was all about and how to do the practice.

    Here I explain the importance of visual cues, finger shapes, pictures, and semantic prompts (fancy speech therapy term for word clues!). By understanding these tools, you can turn practice time into a fun and engaging experience for both of you.

    Why Visual Cues matter?

    Imagine learning a new language just by listening. It’s tough, right? Young children learning new speech sounds face a similar challenge. Visual cues act like flashcards for their minds, giving them a clear picture of how to position their mouth and tongue.

    • Mirrors: Encourage your child to watch your face (and theirs) in the mirror as you make the sound together. This helps them see the tongue placement and lip movements required.
    • Mouth pictures: Speech therapy sheets often have pictures of mouths making specific sounds. Point to the picture and explain how the tongue and lips look, then have your child try to imitate it.
    • Your face is the best cue! Don’t underestimate the power of your own face. Over-enunciate the sound and let your child observe your mouth movements. Watch this little video clip where I am teaching the /SH/ sound to my little student. You cannot see him but we are both sitting on the floor opposite one another so that he can see me easily.

    Finger fun: making sounds with our hands

    Finger shapes are another powerful tool in my speech therapy arsenal. Think of them as fun reminders of how to position the tongue.

    • ‘Open Wide’ fingers: For sounds like /AH/ and /OH/, hold your fingers wide apart, mimicking an open mouth.
    • ‘Tongue Up’ fingers: For sounds like /T/ and /D/, touch the tip of your thumb to your other fingers, creating a little ‘wall’ like the tongue tip touches the teeth ridge.
    • ‘Snake Tongue’ fingers: For the /S/ sound, wiggle your pinky finger to represent the snake-like tongue tip.
    • In this little video clip I am demonstrating the C-shape moving forward which I had taught my child, showing how the windy sound (/SH/) travels forward with lips open and slightly pursed.

    Bringing sounds to life with pictures

    Pictures serve as visual prompts to connect the sound with a familiar word.

    • Video clip: I am using the WINDY SOUND picture and the FLAT TYRE sound picture to represent /SH/ and /S/ respectively
    • Point and Say: Point to each picture and say the word clearly, emphasising the target sound. Encourage your child to repeat.

    Unlocking sounds with semantic prompts

    Semantic prompts are fancy words for clues that help your child guess the target sound. They can be simple questions or descriptive words.

    • ‘Can you feel the wind whooshing?’ (/SH/)
    • Think of tyre going flat, or a balloon losing air, or a train coming to a slow halt (/S/)

    Practice makes progress, but fun makes it funnier!

    Remember, the key is to keep practice sessions light and engaging. Here are some extra tips:

    • Short and sweet: Stick to short practice times (5-10 minutes) to avoid frustration.
    • Make it a routine: Integrate practice time into your daily routine, like after breakfast or before bedtime.
    • Positive reinforcement: Celebrate your child’s efforts with praise and high fives!
    • Make it multisensory: Incorporate sensory activities like blowing bubbles for /F/ or feeling the wind for /SH/.

    Parents you’re a vital part of your child’s speech development, and together we can make huge progress quickly.

    Please contact me if your child has speech sound difficulties.

    Sonja McGeachie

    Early Intervention Speech and Language Therapist

    Feeding and Dysphagia (Swallowing) Specialist The London Speech and Feeding Practice

    The London Speech and Feeding Practice

    Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

    1
  • ·

    How can I incorporate AAC into my speech therapy sessions?

    ByLondon Speech and Feeding

    Many parents are surprised when I bring AAC into a session, especially if they’ve come to see me primarily for speech sound work.

    They might wonder: ‘If we’re working on pronunciation, why are we using a communication device?’

    The simple answer is this: speech therapy is about communication first, and speech sounds second. Supporting a child’s ability to express themselves clearly and confidently is always the priority, and AAC can be a powerful tool alongside spoken speech.

    What do we mean by AAC?

    AAC stands for Augmentative and Alternative Communication.

    This can include:

    • A speech-generating device (such as LAMP Words for Life or GRID as I used in the photo below)
    • A communication app on a tablet
    • A symbol board or communication book
    • Gestures, signs, or visual supports

    AAC does not replace speech. Instead, it supports language development, reduces frustration, and builds communication success while speech skills are developing.

    Pretend Play using Speech and AAC in my clinic room

    But I mainly work on speech sounds… So how does AAC fit?

    Most of the children I see are working on:

    • Articulation difficulties
    • Phonological delay
    • Motor planning challenges (including apraxia/dyspraxia)
    • Unclear speech affecting confidence

    For these children, AAC isn’t a separate therapy. It’s simply woven naturally into what we are already doing.

    If a child brings their device to sessions, I actively include it. If they don’t yet use AAC but could benefit from visual or symbolic support, I may introduce simple options within activities.

    Using AAC to support speech practice

    Let’s say we are working on early speech targets like: ‘GO’.

    We might practise:

    • Saying the word verbally
    • Listening for the target sound
    • Using play (TOY TRAIN GOING ROUND A TRACK)

    Now we can extend this using AAC.

    On the device or communication board, we might model: ‘LET’S GO’ or ‘IT’s GOING up the hill’.

    This allows the child to:

    • Practise their speech sound target
    • Build a simple sentence
    • Experience successful communication even if speech is not fully clear yet

    All responses are valid and supported.

    AAC helps children communicate more than they can say

    Many children can understand and think in longer phrases than they can physically say.

    For example:

    • A child who verbally says single words may build longer phrases on AAC.
    • A child who struggles to plan speech movements may use AAC to communicate smoothly while still practising verbal attempts.
    • A child who becomes frustrated when misunderstood gains a reliable backup system.

    Rather than slowing speech progress, AAC often:

    • Reduces communication pressure
    • Increases participation in therapy
    • Encourages more attempts at speech
    • Supports language growth

    When children feel understood, they usually become more motivated to try speaking.

    There are no ‘prerequisites’ for AAC

    One of the biggest myths I hear is: ‘My child isn’t ready for AAC yet.’

    In reality, children do not need to:

    • Reach a certain speech level
    • Use pictures first
    • Prove they understand everything
    • Show immediate interest

    Instead, we presume competence and introduce AAC in meaningful, playful ways.

    That means:

    • Modelling words while blowing bubbles
    • Commenting during playdough activities
    • Choosing words during games
    • Building simple phrases in shared reading

    AAC should never feel like extra ‘work’. It’s simply another way to join in communication.

    My goal is always the same: to help each child communicate as clearly, confidently, and successfully as possible, using every helpful tool available.

    If your child uses AAC (or might benefit from it)

     Please feel free to:

    • Bring the device to sessions
    • Show me how your child currently uses it
    • Share advice from school or other therapists

    I am very happy to incorporate AAC into our work together so that speech practice, language development, and real communication all move forward hand-in-hand. Because ultimately, therapy isn’t just about producing perfect sounds. It’s about helping your child be heard and understood.

    If you’d like support or advice, please contact me and I can help guide the next steps.

    Sonja McGeachie

    Highly Specialist Speech and Language Therapist

    Owner of The London Speech and Feeding Practice.

      Health Professions Council registered
      Royal College of Speech & Language Therapists Member
      Member of ASLTIP

      Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

      3
    • · · ·

      The quiet power: Why silence and responsiveness boost communication in children with delays

      ByLondon Speech and Feeding
      The quiet power: Why silence and responsiveness boost communication in children with delays
      Supplied by Sonja McGeachie, Practice Owner

      As parents and caregivers, our natural instinct when interacting with a child, especially one who struggles with communication, is often to fill every silence. We might ask lots of questions, offer constant commentary, or try to prompt him or her to speak. Our hearts are in the right place. We want to help him or her communicate! However, for children with language delays or those on the autism spectrum, this well-intentioned approach can sometimes inadvertently create more pressure and fewer opportunities for them to truly initiate and develop their own communication skills.

      What if I told you that one of the most powerful tools in your communication toolkit is often silence? And that responding to your child, rather than always initiating, can unlock incredible potential?

      Let’s explore why these seemingly simple strategies are so profoundly beneficial.

      The unspoken benefits of silence

      In our fast-paced world, silence can feel awkward, but for a child who is processing language differently, it’s a gift:

      1. Time to process: Children with language delays often need more time to process what they hear and to formulate their own thoughts or responses. When we bombard them with words, we don’t give their brains the crucial milliseconds they need to catch up. A pause of 5–10 seconds can make all the difference.
      2. Reduces pressure: Constant questioning or prompting can feel like a test. Silence removes this pressure, creating a more relaxed environment where the child feels safe to communicate without fear of being ‘wrong’ or rushed.
      3. Creates opportunity to initiate: If you’re always talking, when does your child get a turn to start the conversation? Silence opens up a space for him or her to initiate, whether it’s through a sound, a gesture, eye contact, or a word. This is vital for developing spontaneous communication.
      4. Encourages independent thinking: When a child is given space, he or she is more likely to try to figure things out himself or herself. This fosters problem-solving skills and reduces reliance on adult prompts.
      5. Prevents overwhelm (especially for ASD): Many children on the autism spectrum can be sensitive to auditory input. A constant stream of language can be overwhelming, leading to withdrawal or challenging behaviours. Strategic pauses can help them regulate and engage more effectively.

      The power of responding (not just initiating)

      Think of a tennis match: if only one person serves, it’s not a game. Communication is a rally, a back-and-forth exchange. When you primarily respond to your child’s communication attempts, you’re teaching him or her the rhythm of conversation:

      1. Follow the child’s lead: This is a cornerstone of effective language intervention, famously championed by programs like Hanen’s ‘It Takes Two to Talk’. When you respond to what your child is already interested in or doing, the interaction becomes immediately relevant and motivating for him or her.
      2. Validates his or her attempts: Every sound, gesture, glance, or partial word your child offers is a communication attempt. By responding to it, you’re telling him or her, ‘I see you. I hear you. Your communication matters.’ This builds immense confidence and encourages him or her to try again.
      3. Builds confidence and motivation: When a child feels understood and successful in his or her communication, he or she are more likely to communicate more often. It’s a positive feedback loop.
      4. Teaches turn-taking naturally: By taking your turn after his or hers, you model the natural flow of conversation. He or she learns that communication is a shared activity, not a one-sided lecture.
      5. Makes interactions meaningful: When you respond to his or her interests, you’re talking about things that are inherently motivating to him or her. This makes the language you use more easily understood and remembered.

      Practical strategies for parents: Observe, Wait, Listen (OWL)

      The Hanen Centre’s ‘Observe, Wait, Listen’ (OWL) strategy perfectly encapsulates these principles:

      • Observe: Watch your child closely. What is he or she looking at? What is he or she doing? What sounds is he or she making? What gestures is he or she using?
      • Wait: After you’ve observed, wait. Give him or her time. Resist the urge to jump in with a question or comment immediately. Count to five (or even ten) in your head. This silence is an invitation for him or her to communicate.
      • Listen: When he or she does communicate (in any way!), listen intently. Try to understand his or her message or intent.

      Beyond OWL – More tips:

      • Reduce questions, increase comments: Instead of ‘What’s that?’ try ‘Oh, a big red ball!’ or ‘The car is going fast!’ Comments provide language models without demanding a verbal response.
      • Expand, don’t just prompt: If your child says ‘Car’, you could respond with ‘Yes, That’s a big car!’ or ‘It’s really fast!’ You’re building on his or her communication with a slightly richer language model.
      • Create opportunities for communication: Place desired items slightly out of reach. This creates a natural reason for your child to communicate his or her wants (e.g., reaching, pointing, vocalising).
      • Respond to all communication: Don’t just wait for words. If your child points, look where he or she is pointing and comment. If he or she makes a sound, imitate it or respond with a related word.

      In summary

      Embracing silence and prioritising responsiveness might feel counterintuitive at first, especially when you’re eager for your child to talk. However, these powerful strategies create a nurturing, low-pressure environment that encourages spontaneous communication, builds confidence, and truly meets your child where he or she is. By giving your child the space and the meaningful responses he or she needs, you’re laying a strong foundation for his or her communication journey.

      Try incorporating these ‘quiet powers’ into your daily interactions and watch your child’s communication blossom.

      Sonja McGeachie

      Highly Specialist Speech and Language Therapist

      Owner of The London Speech and Feeding Practice.

      Health Professions Council registered
      Royal College of Speech & Language Therapists Member
      Member of ASLTIP

      Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

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