Why Imitation is so Important

ByLondon Speech and Feeding December 1, 2021February 10, 2023

Autism Therapy | Speech and Language Therapy

Why imitation is so important and how can speech and language therapy help children who struggle to imitate?

Imitation or copying starts in early infancy. When we observe a young baby and his parent or familiar adult we can see clearly and frequently that the baby will be intently looking at adult’s face and try to copy their facial expressions, smiles and all those funny baby sounds we often make with young babies.

These sounds are called “motherese” and are the beginnings of a little conversation between the parent and the baby. The “conversation can go back and forth for a long time and include sounds, as well as facial expressions.

A little later on, once the baby can crawl and sit up unaided the copying then goes on to include toys and objects. Mum or Dad will show their toddler how to use a drum or how to put a little train on the wooden tracks and the toddler will try and copy this. They may not succeed and be a little clumsy perhaps but the act of copying anything and everything their favourite adult does is typically seen throughout the day.

We all know and have laughed at mums or dads saying; ssshhh don’t say that in front of the baby he/she will copy you, watch your mouth! (as dad is swearing at the broken radiator….)

This imitation goes on for years and includes eventually of course little words, more words, putting words together and then creating sentences, all the while our toddler is listening to how their adults speak, not only what they say but how they say it. This is how dialects and accents can be transmitted easily from parent /family to child.

Copying in Children with Autism

We know that children with autism often struggle to imitate. We see children on the spectrum typically having great difficulty to copy adults or children; this can be seen in very reduced play with their peers in nursery for example.

Children with autism tend to have reduced joint attention and engagement with others and need to develop the ability and awareness to copy others in order to then engage more jointly with others.

Speech and Language Therapy can help with Parent Child Interaction work and Coaching, here is how:

During my coaching work with parents I teach step by step how to help a child who struggles to imitate:

We look at all the researched skills and actions that adults can take to help their little one to copy, starting with close observation of their child’s interests, then following and including their child’s play and copying/imitating their child in how they play. I teach steps in a graduated way so that it is easy to see the progress and joyful to have the results at the end.

The results are clear to see over time: our children on the spectrum learn to imitate actions, with objects and gestures, then sounds and words. Alongside this increased imitation skill the child can then develop more joint attention and engagement.

I would always recommend Parent Child Interaction Training as a first port of call as we learn so many great techniques which are well researched by the Hanen Programme, www.hanen.org. Do drop me a line if you would like to find out more.

Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

Feeding · Speech and Language Therapy · Top tips

Hard munchables: Chewing through the weaning journey
ByLondon Speech and Feeding July 14, 2025July 23, 2025
As a Speech and Language Therapist with a specialism in paediatric feeding, I’m constantly looking for ways to support families in developing their little ones’ oral motor skills and fostering a positive relationship with food. While Baby-Led Weaning (BLW) has revolutionised how many families introduce solids, (see my previous blog in July 25) a concept that often sparks discussion and curiosity is the use of ‘hard munchables.’

Image by Freepik

What are hard munchables?

The term ‘hard munchables’ refers to specific types of firm non-digestible food items that are offered to babies for oral exploration and skill development, not for nutrition. These are typically foods that babies cannot bite off or swallow in large pieces due to their texture, but which provide resistance for chewing practice.

The phrase was coined by Marsha Dunn Klein, M.Ed., OTR/L, Occupational Therapist and feeding therapist. Well known for her work in paediatric feeding she introduced and advocated for the concept of hard munchables as part of a therapeutic feeding approach, particularly for infants learning to manage textures and develop crucial oral motor skills.

Common examples of hard munchables include:
- Large, raw carrot sticks: Too hard to bite through, but great for gnawing.
- Celery sticks: Like carrots, offering firm resistance.
- Large, raw apple slices (peeled chunks): A firm, slightly sweet option.
- A firm, uncut pear core: With the seeds removed.
- Dried mango cheeks (hard, unsweetened varieties): These offer a fibrous texture.
- A large, fully cooked but firm piece of meat (like a steak bone with some meat attached): The meat provides flavour and a bit of shreddable texture, while the bone is for gnawing.
- Hard crusts of bread or breadsticks (very firm, without soft inner crumb): These can soften slightly with saliva but offer significant resistance.
Image by Freepik

It’s crucial to emphasise that hard munchables are not for consumption or nutrition. They are tools for oral motor development and should always be offered under strict, active supervision.

How do hard munchables fit into weaning?

While weaning (traditional or Baby-Led Weaning) introduces solid foods that a baby can eventually bite and swallow, hard munchables are complementary to the weaning phase. They enhance that phase by helping a child to develop hand dexterity, hand to mouth movement, and oral development.

It’s important to differentiate: Weaning provides the digestible food for eating, while hard munchables provide the tool for skill practice. They are not substitutes for each other but can be used together under careful guidance.

Pros and cons from a speech therapy perspective

As an SLT, I see both the potential benefits and the necessary precautions when incorporating hard munchables.

Pros:
- Enhanced oral motor development: Hard munchables provide excellent resistance training for the jaw, helping to develop the strength, endurance, and coordination needed for efficient chewing. This is foundational for moving beyond purées and very soft textures.
- Promotes lateralisation of the tongue: The act of moving the hard item from side to side in the mouth encourages the tongue to move independently of the jaw, a crucial skill for managing food and for speech sound production.
- Preparation for more complex textures: By strengthening the oral musculature and refining chewing patterns, hard munchables can help babies transition more smoothly to lumpy and mixed textures.
- Sensory exploration: They offer rich sensory input (tactile, proprioceptive) that can be beneficial for oral mapping and awareness, especially for babies who might be orally sensitive.
Cons:
- Choking risk: While the intention is for the baby not to bite off pieces, there is always a risk. Small pieces can break off, or a baby might accidentally bite off a larger chunk than he or she can manage. Active, vigilant supervision is non-negotiable.
- Not a replacement for digestible solids: It’s vital to remember that hard munchables are for practice, not nutrition. They should complement, not replace, the introduction of varied, digestible solid foods.
- Not suitable for all babies: Babies with certain developmental delays, oral motor deficits, or medical conditions might not be appropriate candidates for hard munchables without highly specialised guidance. For instance, babies with an exaggerated gag reflex might find them overwhelming.
Key Considerations for Parents

Here are my top recommendations:
1. Consult with a professional: Always discuss this with your Paediatric Feeding SLT first before you introduce hard munchables. We can assess your baby’s individual readiness and guide you on safe practices.
2. Strict supervision: Never leave your baby unsupervised with a hard munchable, even for a second. Your full attention is required.
3. Appropriate size: Ensure the item is large enough that the baby cannot fit the whole thing in their mouth. It should extend well beyond their fist.
4. No biting off: The goal is gnawing and scraping, not biting off pieces. If your baby is consistently breaking off chunks, stop using them.
5. Focus on skill, not consumption: Reiterate to yourself that this is for practice, not for eating.
In conclusion, hard munchables, when used appropriately and under guidance, can be a very valuable tool to support oral motor development during the weaning journey. However, always be safe and consult with a specialist to ensure your little one develops his or her feeding skills effectively and joyfully.

Sonja McGeachie

Highly Specialist Speech and Language Therapist

Owner of The London Speech and Feeding Practice.

Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

References:

Rapley, G., & Murkett, T. (2008). Baby-Led Weaning: The Essential Guide to Introducing Solid Foods. Vermilion.

Morris, S. E., & Klein, M. D. (2000). Pre-feeding skills: A comprehensive resource for feeding development. Pro-Ed.

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READ MORE Hard munchables: Chewing through the weaning journey
Games · Speech and Language Therapy · Top tips

One toy, endless targets: How to grow consonant clusters, core words and colours with one flower garden toy
ByLondon Speech and Feeding July 22, 2026July 20, 2026
If you’ve been following me for a while you already know my absolute favourite rule for speech therapy: let the toy work for you. You don’t need an entire cabinet full of different flashcards or games to target a massive range of speech goals (though truth be told I do have 4 cabinets! What am I saying…) but often I find that sticking to one highly engaging, open-ended toy reduces a child’s cognitive load, keeps them firmly planted in play, and gives you dozens of natural opportunities for high-repetition practice. It also reduced my cognitive load!

In today’s post we are looking at a classic: The build-a-flower garden toy. A link is here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Fivejoy-Flower-Garden-Building.

This vibrant, stacking toy isn’t just great for fine motor skills. It is an absolute goldmine for speech therapy. While it is incredible for targeting tricky consonant clusters (blends) like /ST/, /SP/, /SPR/, /FL/, /BL/, and /GR/, it is equally powerful for building functional core vocabulary.

1. Digging deep with /ST/

Let’s start building our garden.

Stem & stalk: ‘Look at this long stem!’ or ‘Can you put the stem in?’ or ‘do you want the green or the red stem’?
- Stuck: If a piece is a little tight to push down, it’s a brilliant opportunity for a natural exclamation: ‘Oh no, it’s stuck! Help me!’
- Stand: Once it’s secure, you can celebrate: ‘it can stand up now!’
- 👉 Core word integration: Use this setup stage to practise ANOTHER ONE. As you hold the base pieces, wait for the child to use their words or AAC device to request, ‘I want another one!’ before handing over the next stem.
2. Sowing seeds with /SP/ and /SPR/

Every good gardener needs the right equipment and a close eye for detail. We can introduce tools and descriptive language to hit our /SP/ and triple-blend /SPR/ targets.
- Spade: Grab a toy shovel or pretend to use one. ‘Let’s dig a hole with the spade.’
- Spot: Point to the holes on the base. ‘Find a good spot for this flower.’
- Sprout: Talk about the little green pieces: ‘Look at the little sprout!’
- 👉 Core word integration: Build on spontaneous requesting here. If they are eyeing a specific piece, model a full phrase like: ‘I WANT THE PINK ONE.’
3. /FL/ and fine motor actions

Now, we can start adding the colourful petals.
- Flower: This is your high-frequency word for the entire activity. ‘Put the green/blue/pink flower on top.’
- Flat & flutter: ‘This piece is flat on the ground,’ or ‘The butterfly flutters by!’
- 👉 Core word integration: This stage is perfect for teaching directional actions. Every time they stack a petal onto a stem, model the core phrase: ‘PUT IT ON!’
4. Blending it all together with /BL/

Building a garden is a fantastic sensory experience because of the vivid colours. We can lean heavily into the /BL/ sound by focusing on colour selection and the action of growth.
- Blue & bloom: ‘Should we use a blue flower?’ and ‘Watch it bloom!’
- Blade & blend: Point out the blades of grass and talk about how we blend all the colours together.
- 👉 Core word integration: Don’t just focus on putting the toy together, taking it apart is half the fun! If a child places a piece they don’t want, or when it’s time to clean up, model: ‘TAKE IT OFF.’
5. Working the /GR/

Finally, we look at the environment supporting our garden. The /GR/ blend can be targeted by looking downward at the base of our toy setup.
- Green: Nearly every stem and base piece in this toy is a vibrant shade of green.
- Grass & ground: ‘Put the base down on the ground.’ ‘Look at the green grass.’
- 👉 Core word integration: Combine your /GR/ blend with a powerful core phrase. As you pull a stem upward slowly or stack the petals higher and higher, chant together: ‘MAKE IT GROW! Grow, grow, grow!’
Maximise your repetitions in play

The beauty of the flower garden toy is its repetitive nature. Because a child builds multiple flowers, you aren’t just saying a word or a phrase once, you have the potential to repeat it 10, 15, or 20 times in a single sitting without the child losing interest.

By layering structural speech sounds (like blends) over functional communication phrases (like core words), we give children words they can use across their entire day.

What toy would you like to see us target next in our series? Let me know in the comments on Instagram, and don’t forget to swipe through the carousel there to save these word lists for your next playtime!

If you are concerned about your child’s speech, please do not hesitate to get in touch. I would love to help you find some answers.

Sonja McGeachie

Highly Specialist Speech and Language Therapist

Owner of The London Speech and Feeding Practice.

Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

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READ MORE One toy, endless targets: How to grow consonant clusters, core words and colours with one flower garden toy
Ages and Stages · Speech and Language Therapy · Top tips

Understanding phonological processes in 3–7-year-olds: What’s typical and when to seek help
ByLondon Speech and Feeding February 18, 2026February 13, 2026
As a speech and language therapist, one of the most common questions I hear from parents is:

‘They can talk, but their speech still sounds immature. Is this normal?’

Many children between the ages of three and seven use speech patterns that make their words sound different from adult speech. These patterns are known as phonological processes, and for younger children, they are a normal part of speech development.

However, when these processes persist beyond the expected age, they can start to affect clarity, confidence and learning, especially once children enter school.

This blog will help you understand:
- what phonological processes are
- which patterns are typical at different ages
- and when it might be time to seek speech therapy support
What are phonological processes?

Phonological processes are patterns of sound simplification that children use while their speech system is developing.

Instead of learning each sound one by one, children initially organise sounds into patterns that make speech easier to produce. This is a normal and efficient strategy for a developing brain.

For example:
- saying ‘tar’ instead of ‘car’
- saying ‘poon’ instead of ‘spoon’
- saying ‘bud’ instead of ‘bus’
These are not ‘bad habits’. They are part of how speech develops.

The key question is how long these patterns last.

Common phonological processes (and when they usually disappear)

Below are some of the most common processes parents notice in 3–7-year-olds.

1. Final consonant deletion

Leaving off the last sound in a word
- ‘ca’ for cat, ‘da’ for dog
- Typically resolved by 3–3½ years
2. Fronting

Replacing back sounds (k, g) with front sounds (t, d)
- ‘tar’ for car, ‘do’ for go
- Typically resolved by 3½–4 years
3. Cluster reduction

Omitting one sound in a consonant cluster
- ‘poon’ for spoon, ‘top’ for stop
- Typically resolves by 4–5 years (some clusters slightly later)
4. Gliding

Replacing /R/ or /L/ with /W/ or /Y/
- ‘wabbit’ for rabbit, ‘yion’ for lion
- Can be typical up to 5–6 years
5. Weak syllable deletion

Leaving out unstressed syllables
- ‘nana’ for banana
- Usually resolved by 4 years
If these patterns continue past the expected age, speech can remain difficult to understand particularly for unfamiliar listeners such as teachers, peers, and also Auntie Karen or grandparents who visit once in a while.

Why phonological processes matter in school-age children

By the time children reach reception and Year 1, speech clarity becomes increasingly important.

Persistent phonological difficulties can affect:
- being understood by teachers and peers
- phonics and early reading
- spelling
- confidence in speaking
- willingness to participate in class
Some children become aware that they ‘sound different’ and may speak less, avoid longer words, or become frustrated when misunderstood.

What’s the difference between a delay and a disorder?

This is an important distinction.
- A phonological delay means a child is following the normal pattern of development, just more slowly.
- A phonological disorder means the child is using atypical patterns, or continuing age-expected patterns well beyond when they should have resolved.
A speech and language assessment helps identify:
- which processes are present
- how many are affecting speech
- how consistent the errors are
- and whether intervention is needed
Signs it may be time to seek speech therapy

You may want to seek professional advice if your child:
- is 3½ years or older and still hard to understand
- is understood well by family but not by others
- becomes frustrated or avoids talking
- has difficulty with phonics or spelling
- uses several phonological processes at once
- has not made progress despite time and encouragement
Early support does not mean something is ‘wrong’. It simply helps speech development move forward more efficiently.Research consistently shows that unresolved phonological processes beyond the expected age can impact intelligibility, literacy and confidence (Dodd, 2014; Bowen, 2015).

How speech therapy helps phonological development

Phonological therapy is not about drilling individual sounds endlessly.

Instead, therapy focuses on:
- helping children recognise sound patterns
- building awareness of contrasts (e.g. ‘tar’ vs ‘car’)
- practising speech in meaningful, playful ways
- supporting generalisation so progress carries into everyday speech
For school-aged children, therapy is usually structured, motivating and highly targeted and progress can be very encouraging.

A final reassurance

Many children with phonological difficulties go on to develop clear, confident speech with the right support.

If you’re unsure whether your child’s speech is ‘just a phase’ or something that needs attention, a professional assessment can give clarity and peace of mind.

If you’d like support or advice, please contact me and I can help guide the next steps.

Sonja McGeachie

Highly Specialist Speech and Language Therapist

Owner of The London Speech and Feeding Practice.

Research references
Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

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READ MORE Understanding phonological processes in 3–7-year-olds: What’s typical and when to seek help
Speech and Language Therapy

Quick Overview Of How To Implement Those Early Hanen Speech And Language Strategies
ByLondon Speech and Feeding December 18, 2021January 31, 2023
First up try and get down at eye level or Face-to-Face with your child

Try to sit so that your child can see you easily, i. e. your child does not have to look up to make eye contact with you. We call that Face to Face: try and sit opposite your child. This makes it easier for you to see facial expressions and therefore pick up nonverbal /pre-verbal communication. Now you can connect and share the moment with your child.

OWL (Observe, Wait and Listen)

Never skip this step as it prepares us for what happens next !

Observe

First, try and simply watch your child quietly and listen and observe what he/she says or does; you need to know what your little one is interested in. For example with this toy (pictured below) we could observe that your child loves the actual spinning of the marble, perhaps more than that noisy click-clacking down the run. Or perhaps he loves collecting the marble at the end and feeling it in his hand.

You could start off with showing once how the marble goes down and say:“ look it goes round and round !” Then hold back and observe, without speaking, so that your child has time to explore the toy.

Wait

Just sit and avoid telling or showing your child what he or she could do with the toy. This gives your child an opportunity to explore and experiment.

Listen

Listen to what your child says, or look at your child’s non-verbal communication without interrupting. Your child will now feel and know that you are really present and that what they have to say is important. It’s best to avoid questions like, “What are you doing or “What’s this?” as that might be a lot of pressure when they don’t know what to say about that yet.

Respond immediately by showing interest

Once you have all the information from OWLing you can respond in the right way, for example: if she catches the marble at the end of the run and looks up with a smile or a sound you could respond with: you’ve got it! One marble in your hand! Nice playing!

Now how to join in the play:

First you can copy what your child is doing

If your child puts the first marble at the top of the run you can take a turn and do exactly the same once his marble is done. Ideally you might have another marble run, perhaps a similar one, it does not have to be exactly the same! Once your child has put the first marble in you can do the exact same with your own marble on your run. Your child is likely to look at what you are doing and you might well see a smile on their face or perhaps she might say: look at mine!

Next you can build on that

You can respond with simple comments like: “Wow! Yes I am looking at yours now! It’s spinning on the red one lots! I love the noise!” Now wait once more to see what your child says or does.

To summarise

We are signalling to our child that we are really interested in what they are doing and saying so we can “collect” our child, i.e. bring him/her back into a joint interaction.

Important

We want to try and not direct our child but respond with interest and fun! This creates a lovely stage for interaction and joint play! And this leads in turn to practising conversation and ever more opportunities for great speech and language skills to emerge.

Great activities we use in Speech and Language Therapy:
- Any cause and effect toys like this Marble Run
- Creative activities, such as mark making with crayons
- Train tracks (building and running the trains)
Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.
READ MORE Quick Overview Of How To Implement Those Early Hanen Speech And Language Strategies
Autism Therapy · Neurodiversity · Speech and Language Therapy

The power of containment: A therapeutic approach for autistic children
ByLondon Speech and Feeding August 16, 2024August 15, 2024
Photo by lemonlenz

The practice of wrapping or swaddling children, often referred to as ‘containment,’ has been used for centuries to soothe and comfort infants. I use this therapeutic approach with autistic children at the London Speech and Feeding Practice. While it might seem counterintuitive, the act of being tightly wrapped can provide significant benefits for children who struggle with sensory processing, emotional regulation, and communication.

Understanding sensory processing and autism

Autistic persons often experience challenges with sensory processing, which is their brain’s ability to interpret and respond to sensory information. This can lead to sensory overload or under-responsivity. Containment can be a valuable tool in helping children regulate their sensory input.

Photo by lemonlenz

To summarise, here are some of the benefits of containment:
- Sensory Regulation:
  
  Provides deep pressure input: The tight, enveloping sensation of being wrapped can provide deep pressure input, which is calming and organising for many children.
  
  Reduces sensory overload: By creating a controlled sensory environment, containment can help to reduce overstimulation and promote a sense of safety.
- Emotional Regulation:
  
  Containment creates a sense of security: Being wrapped tightly can mimic the feeling of being in the womb, providing a sense of security and comfort.
  
  Facilitates calming: The deep pressure input can help to calm the nervous system and reduce anxiety.
- Improved Body Awareness:
  
  Enhances proprioception: Containment can improve the child’s awareness of their body in space, which is essential for motor development and sensory integration. I often provide extra pressure on a child’s arms and legs sticking out of the yoga mat; this helps my child understand where their limbs are in space: I can feel my legs and I can feel my arms and I can feel where they are right now, i.e. they are under Sonja’s hand, I can feel them.
- Facilitates Communication – and this is obviously where I come in as a Speech and Language Therapist:
  
  Swaddling creates a safe space: When a child feels calm and secure, they are more likely to engage in communication.
  
  Enhances joint attention: The shared experience of being wrapped can foster joint attention, which is essential for language development. You can see this one in my highlights where I swaddle my student in the yoga mat (picture above). She absolutely loves it, and what is more she is calm and steady when usually this child likes to be on the move constantly. Here we have a wonderful moment of joint engagement. She looks at me, she can listen to what I say or sing, and she can tell me in her own way to carry on rolling her or to carry on singing or providing calming pressure to her legs and arms or to stop.
A few pointers for when you try this at home: How to practise containment safely and effectively
- Create a safe environment: Ensure the wrapping material is soft, breathable, and free from any hazards.
- Observe your child’s cues: Pay attention to your child’s body language and verbal cues to determine their comfort level.
- Respect your child’s boundaries: If your child shows signs of distress, stop the containment immediately – this might seem obvious but sometimes we adults get so carried away with some ‘great idea’ that we have seen work elsewhere. And so we can be a little too ‘determined’ sometimes to ‘make it happen’… perhaps this rings a bell with some of my readers.
- MAKE IT FUN: Start carefully and take it step by step. See if the student is having a nice time. It is all about trust and therefore it might not work the very first time you do it.
It’s important to remember that containment is not a one-size-fits-all approach. Some children may respond better to other sensory-based interventions. However, for many autistic children containment can be a valuable tool in their journey towards improved communication and emotional regulation.

For more information follow me on Instagram, Facebook or LinkedIn.

Sonja McGeachie

Early Intervention Speech and Language Therapist

Feeding and Dysphagia (Swallowing) Specialist The London Speech and Feeding Practice

The London Speech and Feeding Practice

Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

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Autism Therapy · Feeding · Neurodiversity · Speech and Language Therapy · Top tips

Managing mealtime sensory overload at holiday gatherings: Supporting children with allergies and feeding differences
ByLondon Speech and Feeding December 17, 2025December 16, 2025
Holiday meals are meant to be joyful and something we all look forward to. But for many children and their families, these occasions can be overwhelming and be the cause of dread and worry. The combination of new smells, unfamiliar foods, loud environments, social expectations, and allergy anxieties can quickly turn what should be a festive time into a stressful one.

For parents of children with sensory processing differences, selective eating challenges, or food allergies, holiday gatherings often require careful planning and a big dose of tolerance and compassion. The good news is that with awareness and a few gentle strategies, you can support your child to feel safe, regulated, and included during festive meals without pressure, tears, or discomfort.

Let’s explore how to make holiday mealtimes calmer, safer, and more connected this season.

🎄 Why holiday meals feel so overwhelming

Holiday gatherings usually combine several sensory triggers all at once:
- Noisy, chaotic rooms
- Strong smells from a mix of foods we don’t normally cook
- Multiple conversations happening at once
- Bright lights, Christmas décor, flickering candles
- Unfamiliar foods with unexpected textures
- Expectations to ‘try everything’ or ‘enjoy it’s sooo good!’
- New environments, seating arrangements, or routines
For children with sensory sensitivities, this can feel like a tidal wave of input. Research shows that children who are sensory-sensitive often have heightened responses to smell, taste, and texture, which may lead to avoidance or distress at mealtimes (Cermak, Curtin, & Bandini, 2010).

Add food allergies into the picture and anxiety increases even further for both children and parents. A 2020 study by DunnGalvin et al. found that children with food allergies experience significantly higher stress in shared eating environments, especially when food preparation or contamination risk is hard to control.

So, if your child becomes tearful, shuts down, or refuses to sit at the festive table, it isn’t ‘bad behaviour.’ It’s sensory overload, heightened vigilance, or discomfort communicating through their body.

🌟 Preparing your child for a calmer festive meal

Preparation is especially important for sensory-sensitive or allergy-aware children. Here’s how to set them up for success:

1. Offer predictability through previewing

Before the event, show your child pictures of:
- where you’re going
- who will be there
- the types of foods that might be served
- where they might sit
A visual schedule or social story can help reduce anxiety and give your child a sense of control.

2. Pack safe foods without apology

If your child has allergies or selective eating, bring:
- ‘Safe foods’ you know they will eat
- Backup snacks
- A separate (their own) plate, if needed
- Emergency medication
Announce clear, firm boundaries such as:

‘Ok people, these are Jamie’s safe foods — we’ll stick with these today.’ This will help relatives understand without pressure or judgement.

3. Choose seating that supports sensory regulation

If possible, seat your child:
- at the end of the table
- near a familiar adult
- away from the kitchen (strong smells)
- away from noise clusters
- give them their favourite toy or fidget whilst waiting
Let them take breaks when needed. This isn’t ‘rude,’ it’s self-regulation.

🍽️ Supporting children during the meal

1. Focus on connection, not consumption

The holidays are not the time to expand your child’s food range. Keeping mealtimes low-pressure actually supports long-term progress.

In fact, the research is clear: pressuring children to eat decreases acceptance and increases refusal (Galloway et al., 2006).

So instead of ‘Just try it!’ try:
- ‘You don’t have to eat it, you can look at it.’
- ‘You’re in charge of what goes in your mouth.’
- ‘You can keep your safe foods on your plate.’
2. Protect your child’s allergy safety

Holiday meals often include:
- cross-contamination risks
- shared utensils
- buffets
- homemade dishes without ingredient lists
Use gentle but firm scripts:
- ‘Because of Ellie’s allergies, we’ll keep her plate separate.’
- ‘We’ll serve her food ourselves to make sure she stays safe.’
Confidence in your boundary helps others respect it.

3. Manage sensory load in real time

Offer:
- headphones
- a small chew or fidget toy
- a designated ‘calm corner’
- time outside for fresh air
- a predictable signal for breaks (e.g., a hand squeeze or card)
Remember, sensory regulation is healthcare, not ‘giving in.’

4. Model calm eating

Children learn most from watching.

Slow, happy bites and relaxed facial expressions tell the nervous system: ‘This environment is safe’.

💛 What to say to well-meaning relatives

Families often have big feelings about food. You can prepare nice phrases like:
- ‘We’re focusing on helping him feel safe around food today.’
- ‘She has allergies, so we’re sticking to our plan.’
- ‘We’re avoiding pressure because it helps him eat better long term.’
- ‘We’re celebrating together, eating is not the goal today.’
Setting expectations ahead of time can reduce awkward moments later.

🎁 The bigger picture: It’s about safety, not ‘picky eating’

Children with allergies, sensory differences, or feeding challenges aren’t trying to be difficult. They are trying to stay safe, regulated, and comfortable.

Your calm presence, gentle boundaries, and preparation create the conditions for a holiday that feels peaceful, not pressured.

Sonja McGeachie

Highly Specialist Speech and Language Therapist

Owner of The London Speech and Feeding Practice.

Find a speech and language therapist for your child in London. Are you concerned about your child’s speech, feeding or communication skills and don’t know where to turn? Please contact me and we can discuss how I can help you or visit my services page.

📚Research References

Cermak, S. A., Curtin, C., & Bandini, L. G. (2010). Food selectivity and sensory sensitivity in children with autism spectrum disorders. Journal of the American Dietetic Association, 110(2), 238–246.

DunnGalvin, A. et al. (2020). APPEAL-2: A pan-European qualitative study to explore the burden of peanut-allergic children, teenagers and their caregivers. Clinical & Experimental Allergy, 50(11), 1238–1248.

Galloway, A. T., Fiorito, L. M., Francis, L. A., & Birch, L. L. (2006). ‘Finish your soup!’ Counterproductive effects of pressuring children to eat on intake and affect. Appetite, 46(3), 318–323.

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